Not exactly my proudest moment, but ridiculously amusing all the same.
Winding our way through the crowded markets and bazaars surrounding Hyderabad’s Charminar provides the perfect opportunity for this week’s mental breakdown. 100+ degree temperatures combined with clouds of dust and exhaust fumes set the stage. As I push my way through the people, an old woman steps up and grabs my arm. “10 rupees!” she screeches at me. I continue on with her clinging to me. I yank my arm away and she curses me in Urdu. A dozen well-off Indians videoing the Charminar stand mere feet from her. She doesn’t approach a single one; instead, she makes a B-line for Thomas.
A man runs out and pleads, “What country? You want shawl?” I ignore him and the next three touts. Another man appears directly in front of my face, “Mangoes, mangoes, mangoes, mangoes, mangoes, mangoes.” Sounds good, but he is so annoying I decide I don’t want to reward him with business. Somewhere in the distance, I hear Thomas yell, “Weg! Lass mich in Ruhe! Get the hell away from me.”
Suddenly, I feel a tugging at my leg. I look down to discover a dwarf woman pulling on my Continue…